Friday, August 31, 2007

Story of David and Jonathan

David and how he slew the mighty giant Goliath. He was a warrior, a musician, a poet and the subject and admiration behind Michelangelo's famous sculpture, "The statue of David", which stands in Florence as a detailed representation of the male anatomy; demonstrating the beauty of male human body. However, this handsome king also caught the attention of another young man during his time on earth.

After slaying Goliath it so happened that David was brought before Saul, King Of Israel, Father of Jonathan. 1 Sam 18:1 tells us "And it came to pass, when he [David] had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul." The Book of 1 Samuel then continues to explain the extent of the love that Jonathan had for David telling the story of how he took his own robe from his back , along with his other worldly possessions and shared them with David in order to form a covenant with David because of the love he had for him.

The Trials and Tribulations

The people of Israel were also fond of David. So much so that Saul became jealous and attempted to kill David. However, 1 Sam 19:2 states "But Jonathan Saul's son delighted much in David: and Jonathan told David, saying, Saul my father seeketh to kill thee: now therefore, I pray thee, take heed to thyself until the morning, and abide in a secret place, and hide thyself:" We go on to learn that during the private time they shared David tells Jonathan "Thy father certainly knoweth that I have found grace in thine eyes." (1 Sam. 20:3). Jonathan then replies 'Whatsoever thy soul desireth, I will even do it for thee..."

Jonathan evetually approaches his father during dinner. Saul tells his son "Thou son of the perverse rebellious woman, do not I know that thou hast chosen the son of Jesse [David] to thine own confusion, and unto the confusion of thy mother's nakedness'" (1 Sam. 20:30). Jonathan leaves the dinner table angry and saddened. Out of grief Jonathan does not eat meat the second day of the month. He goes to David at the hiding place. "David arose out of a place toward the south, and fell on his face to the ground, and bowed himself three times: and they kissed one another, and wept one with another, until David exceeded. And Jonathan said to David, Go in peace, forasmuch as we have sworn both of us in the name of the LORD, saying, The LORD be between me and thee, and between my seed and thy seed for ever. And he arose and departed: and Jonathan went into the city." (1 Sam. 20:41-42).

The Death of Jonathan

Saul continues to pursue David (1 Sam. 21-23:14); David and Jonathan renew their covenant together (1 Sam. 23:15-18); and eventually Saul and David reconcile (1 Sam. 24:16-22). When Jonathan is slain on Mt. Gilboa by the Philistines (1 Sam. 31:2), David laments his death saying, "I am distressed for thee, my brother Jonathan: very pleasant hast thou been unto me: thy love to me was wonderful, surpassing the love of women." (2 Sam. 1:26).

Surely there was a great love between both David and Jonathan but the question remains: what kind of love was this?...platonic? romantic? sexual? Or is it just left to one's own interpretation; guiding you how to live a life of worthy love?

Thursday, August 30, 2007

African Anglicans and the USA

While most of the blogosphere centers in the Larry Craig scandal/case, and you can find a lot of similar opinions out there, I'm likely to keep pointing to Africa-USA religious relationships. Not only Nigeria and Uganda, this time it's been Kenya (and formerly Tanzania) Anglican Church which is extending tentacles into US in the form of American Bishops paying allegiance to those Anglican National branches. Bishops Bill Murdoch, of Massachusetts, and Bill Atwood, of Texas, will be answerable to the Kenyan Church, although they will serve in the US, the decision taken because, of course, Episcopal Church is not having a sane, clearly Godly, stance on homosexuality. Fred writes about it on Jeckyll and F J Hyde blog: "This unacceptable and unconscionable bigotry does nothing more than further physical, emotional and spiritual violence against gays and lesbians".

Quite likely, Fred. However some of us have already chosen to leave those anti-gay churches, chapters, parishes and sects out of our life. And we're not less spiritually rich than they claim to be.

Any of these days I'll have to write my own rant about the matter. Maybe it's that those US bishops are trying to use African countries as guinea pigs, an experiment on how to forbid and punish homosexuality — and then transplant it to the States?

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

On Freedom of Marriage

[DISCLAIMER: This post reflects only the views of the writer, not those of the Blog]

I consider myself a person who has some respect for other people, especially those who don't think the same way I do. Anyway, one tends to have a superb view of self, so I may be much worse than I think. And, in any case, I do really think that Christians should be allowed to marry. They should even be allowed to adopt children, like any other kind of people.

I'm right now figuring out the many voices claiming against this point of view, but before start all your rants, you should bear in mind this: Christians are persons too, just the same kind of persons we are. It only happens that they chose to believe, unlike we, who never chose to be attracted to same-sex people. But we can't blame them for their choosings; after all, they do that in the hope to be better human beings.

So, how can we be against their wish to sanctify their civil bond, commitment to be two of them together forever (till death do them part)? No, isn't that wish the same one we have, at some given point in our life? If they prefer to believe that there's a god sanctifying their bond, we have the justice of the peace, and they have to legalize their marriage in the same place we do ours, no?

Some of you may be thinking that marriage is not the worst thing we could allow Christians to do, but it'd be allowing them to adopt children. Wouldn't those children be in a greater risk to become Christians if raised within a Christian household? Well, I can't deny that possibility, but I honestly believe that, since religious views are a matter people choose, such children would be able to adopt some critical view on a later stage, then become Buddhist, Atheist, Muslim, or Hinduist.

Thus, from this humble tribune which this blog is, I dare to say "Christians, I have no problem with you marrying each other". And by extension, I have no problem that people of other beliefs marry themselves too.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Revisiting Nigeria

And here we go again with this favorite country of mine, Nigeria. Yesterday I was slightly pointing a link to some news about the 18 guys arrested and almost lynched for cross-dressing in Bauchi, northern Nigeria, and since I'm not a national of the country (but have had some Nigerian experiences before) I'll give voice to Akin who writes a beautiful article in his blog on the issue — let's make it extensive to most fundamentalist religions, faiths and creeds, and don't forget Akinola, who seems to be heading towards the Fred Phelps direction (by the way, his latest rant says God hates Mexico too, hurricane Dean is the proof. St. Lucians, Jamaicans and other Caribbeans are just collateral casualties, as in "friendly fire").

But again an old sketch on Naija: on a BBC report apparently dated 2004 we can read that a senior football (soccer for the US readers) official in Nigeria "ordered the removal of any unacceptable players at an upcoming junior tournament. He said their behaviour was not culturally acceptable and promoted homosexuality." What was the fuss over? Hairstyles, no less.

Monday, August 27, 2007

American gay men don't want to marry?

Via Pink News, an analysis on a study which reports that "the proportion of American gay men calling for the right to marry their partners in a church is as low as 36 per cent".

Well, does it mean that gay Americans don't want to marry? I'd put an emphasis in the "marry their partners in a church" part of the headlines. With no further knowledge of what the average gay American male thinks and lives, it seems to me quite probable that they get so disappointed with the many and various Christian churches in their country supporting the sanctity of marriage as a Church institution, that they are giving up any hope of stepping into any kind of Temple to get married. It's not clear from the analysis made at the Pink News site whether they equate church marriage with civil marriage or the latter would be called "same-sex unions".

In 2005 Spain, the government introduced an Act allowing same-sex marriage, civil, different to that spiritual bond sacralized by religious entities, yet legally providing same rights to any kind of couple. We knew that the majoritary Catholic Church wouldn't recognize such civil marriages, but they in fact don't recognize civil marriage as religiously bonding, and nonetheless the whole Catholic Hierarchy from the Vatican to the last bishop in Spain campaigned against such a law, with demonstrations and all (some people accurately pointed out that those same bishops never happen to walk within any demonstration against Iraq war, in spite of the Pope speaking against it).

So what's the problem with churches and religious organizations and civil marriage? I beieve that, being civil marriage a thing of the justice of the peace, priests, pastors, imams and the like can't take control of it. Can we happily give religion the right to dictate our laws? We might want, but if we carefully think about it, we can end up within systems so restrictive of rights as northern Nigeria's shari'a. Some might argue that Christian churches don't ask for lapidation of homosexuals; but it might be just a matter of time.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Again: Religion-based Homophobia.

It's been almost a week since our last post, but the waiting's been worth. With renewed energy we're reviewing other people's blogs and sites, and in half an hour we've come across two interesting posts by people we never heard of before.

On the Diary of a Middle Aged Bisexual Rogue we found this nice sentence, which almost made me think that there can be a chance to live in a place nearby religious people:

Something got me mad yesterday. I did some research into an organisation called Christian Voice who were protesting at Pride. It turns out they are a right wing organisation who are more interested in homophobia than the word of God. They rant incessantly about gay people - even using the word queer in its most insulting context. Where is the love of God?

Thank you Auntie Alice, for being a believer and still being respectful to us gay and lesbian people.

Lex on "What Would Charles Martel Do?" starts yesterday's post with these words:

Some rat-bastards stole my fucking rainbow flag! They just lowered it and stole it and left the hooks hanging!

And believe me, it's a post worth reading, what you're doing here yet? You should have already opened a new window with it!!!

Today's bringing more news on Ted Haggard. Michelangelo Signorile writes on The Gist that The Haggard Story Gets More Demented and it's something worth reading too. I'm starting to believe that religious freedom tends to be more a money-making machine than real freedom of beliefs, at least in the Americas (OK, OK, in Europe too, and Ok, also in the whole world). And the jewel on this post must be a MySpace-stile site which should complement GodTube: MyChurch. Religion goes Web 2.0.

Monday, August 20, 2007

It's a weird weird world (I)

A flash about what's weird in the news lately. Take a look at the world, and notice that you're not weird. Or at least not the weirdest.

  • In Australia, a camel pet owner was killed when the animal, probably in love, tried to make love to her.
  • Also in Australia, three men stole a wheelchair to go drinking.
  • At Belgrade Zoo, it seems that some guy tried to start a party with the bears. The wrong bears, though.
  • Florida police exchange a pair of Reebok sneakers for a missile laucher.
  • In the Mediterranean coast of Spain, not only car drivers will be subjected to breath analysis to determine whether they're drunk. Also yacht owners.
  • And last, but not least, it's been almost one month since Norway's Princess Martha Louise declared she can talk to angels. I'm still waiting, sweetie.
Technorati tags: , , ,

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Another "ex-gay" turn of screw

Sometimes one's browsing the internet and comes across really weird things, like this first one. Through The Bilerico Project we can reach to some illustrations and story on a children book by Richard Cohen which explains the process of becoming gay and understanding it, thus getting ready to leave homosexuality behind.

Meanwhile, in Australia, some Ex-Gay Leaders apologize for causing "more harm than good".

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

News around the world

And just to keep a bit updated, these news:

Italian politician calls for "ethnic cleansing" of gays

The northern Italian city of Treviso has witnessed mass demonstrations after the deputy mayor called for the ethnic cleansing of homosexuals.

Hundreds of demonstrators gathered outside the city hall at the weekend demanding his resignation.

Giancarlo Gentilini, told a local television station on Wednesday: "I will immediately give orders to my forces so that they can carry out an ethnic cleansing of faggots."
Australians demonstrate against ban on gay marriage

Thousands of people marched yesterday in Brisbane, Melbourne and Sydney as part of the National Day of Action, which marked the three year anniversary of gay marriage being outlawed.

The largest of the marches was in Melbourne, where more than 5,000 people attended. All the marches were peaceful.

Prime Minister John Howard's Liberal government passed federal legislation in 2004 banning same-sex marriage.
Ban on homosexuality in Uganda "unenforceable"

Ugandan laws prohibiting homosexual activity have resulted in no arrests of couples despite people being open about their sexuality and the fact that there are more than 160 members of leading gay organisations.

According to the, Oscar Kihika, the president of the Uganda Law Society said: "You can't just arrest someone for saying they are gay.

"That's like arresting someone just because he says he stole something, with no proof," he said.
Nigerian men could face death penalty for 'gay marriage'

18 men have been arrested at a hotel in northern Nigeria and charged with sodomy.

The men, who were detained by police on Sunday, come from different parts of Nigeria and were allegedly dressed in women's clothes. They had come together to celebrate a gay 'marriage,' according to the NAN government news agency.

The arrests took place in Bauchi city, the capital of a Muslim state in the centre of Nigeria with a population of 316,000.

Technorati tags: , , , , ,

Gay Rights Watch: Oregon's Homophobia

Over 75 percent of Oregonians believe that a person should be fired from their job SIMPLY because they are gay or lesbian. Included in that over 75% are evangelical church leaders.

Thanks Gavin for the correction. That really changes the whole thing. still there is almost 25 that believe it, that's almost one out of four.

Technorati tags: , , ,

How I was on the verge of being saved from abomination

Much more often than it should, religion mingles with sexuality in odd manners. I'm not challenging the good will of believers who back in my life tried to heal my abominational sexual drive — though not directed towards them. The first time I recall someone trying to put all his skills into remaking me heterosexual it must have been in the early 90s when I was working part time as editor for some sort of Islamic monthly magazine. The imam proposed explicitly "a very successful therapy based in electroshocks" which I didn't hesitate to kindly refuse. Some years later, for reasons not pertaining to this story, I was more or less introduced into the Nigerian community in Madrid when one of them, a Pentecostalist pastor, thought that it was time to save a soul for Jesus.

By that time, my attitude towards mild fundamentalistic faiths had slightly changed, proven that dialogue wouldn't work to let me alone, I had aleady assumed that the best apporach was to dress myself into a militant atheist custom, but that wouldn't work with Nigerian pentecostalists either. I was to be saved, whether I wanted it or not. After five days of being shadowed by the pastor in question every time I was to be working at any of the many Nigerian owned internet cafes in the southern area of Madrid, I confessed my discomfort to a close friend. This good brother dropped my sexual behavior to the pastor, who became horrified. His efforts had to be doubled at least, if Jesus was to gain a sinner for his reign.

I managed to stay away from system maintenance for some days but I couldn't avoid it forever, and some given Saturday evening there happened to be a failure in a computer. I was called, and of course the pastor was there, couldn't have happened otherwise. Tony was there too, and the drama was perceptibly approaching. I started to fix the computer while the pastor started his invokations to the Holy Ghost to descend upon me and heal all my sins. I was guaranteed to marry a nice girl and have half dozen kids after that evening. Yuck!

When I finished with the system maintenance, the religious job was still not done. Probably I drew a bit of negative influence upon me by having a couple of beers and joking with other people around while the guy entered his final round of jaculatories, but I had no idea yet about how to get rid of such elements. Eventually, with a final delivery of powerful faithful energy, I was done the complete process of rebirth in Christ and transform into a happy heterosexual man. The pastor approached, proud of God's work.

And then I kissed him, mouth to mouth. Probably he didn't enjoy, I didn't put much passion on that. My friend Tony dropped to the floor in laughs, and he wasn't the only one. I never was tried to be saved again, up to this day.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

HRC/Logo debate - And my own August break

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm taking a small break to get the house reforms finished (those small details you know). Just for one week or so. I'll be going out a lot anyway, and probably taking some pictures on my village holidays which happen to be around the 15th too.

So I'm leaving you all in the best possible company: all my other fellow bloggers here (thank you very much all), and don't miss today the HRC/Logo dem presidential debate on LGBT issues. You can watch it at Logo online. Check the site for detailed information.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

More Anti-Gay Speech. Phelps and Blair.

Aha! It was time to get it announced, how not. So Fred Phelps is going to "stage protests at funerals of victims of the 35W bridge collapse to state that God made the bridge fall because he hates America, and especially Minnesota, because of its tolerance of homosexuality." Couldn't be no other. Ask our mates at Good As You about the Phelpesses of this world, they have the theory that such a family name could have something to do with the bearer's gay hate (Thank you for the blog, and all the Youtube videos), and they look like real experts in such phenomena (note, with "ph" like "phelps").

And miles southwards, on the Caribbean Jamaica, Bishop Herro Blair warns politicians to not be permissive at all with abortion and homosexuality: "To legalise the murder of an unborn child and to legalise same-sex marriage - it is not here yet - but it is a slap in the face to the Almighty God." Since I didn't attend the meeting, I can't affirm that he didn't do similar remarks on political corruption, religious hypocrisy, heterosexual pederastia, wars for oil, unemployment, hate crimes and all those not-so-important aspects of island and continental life.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Bob Allen: when scared, he does oral

From The Advocate news: Florida politician Bob Allen, charged with "solicitation to commit prostitution" after arrested on July 11th in Titusville, said recently that "this was a pretty stocky black guy, and there was nothing but other black guys around in the park" where he was, so he thought that the best solution for him being scared of Black thuggish types was to address the guy and offering him $20 for letting him do a fellatio. Allen version is different from the Black guy's, Danny Kavanaugh, which you can read on the above link. You can read both, anyway, but, come on Bob!

Let me picture myself into this: so I'm a politician, (by definition someone more or less important and allegedly heard by the police), and then I go strolling parks and peeking males on stalls? Oh, sure, there's nothing wrong with it, eh? And when something scares me, for instance, the sight of a stocky black man, instead of calling my Ku Klux Klan fellow knights to protect ourselves better, I go and offer the guy a blow job? Well, still nothing much wrong. But Bob, 20 bucks? Stocky built, probably hung as a horse... Bob, come on, that's at least 50 dollars.

Oh, of course. You weren't there looking to have sex with anybody and certainly weren't there to exchange money for it.

To which extent is lying a common habit of politicians?

Passive-aggressive Segregation

Via Guerra Eterna, an interesting article from Kansas City dot Com about segregation in Iraq's toilettes.

Right now, the segregating sign is more of a passive-aggressive kind, but Mr. Ugarte points out where it could end up. The reason? History seems to be circular.

And how does it link to LGBT issues? Well, you can figure that if someone says “We can’t accept people washing their feet where I brush my teeth,” hm, such hygienic reasons could be used against homosexuals at any given time. And since Iñigo links this to former South African apartheid, let me reccomend you all a South African movie called Proteus. Don't miss it.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Alex Blaze on Michael Lucas op-ed in NY Blaze.

Something to not miss is Alex Blaze comment on an op-ed at NY Blaze on Charles Merritt and his performing art. Must read. I totally subscribe it. Alex, chapeau!!!

Click the above link and go read that post, come on!!!

LGBT paradise in Europe endangered?

Amsterdam, once well known as Gay paradise in Europe, is endangered. From 16 attacks on homosexuals in 2006, the number of such in 2007 (Jan-Aug) has already raised up to 18, informs El País (Spanish). The former Blue and Pink hotline established by Dutch police to receive denounces on homophobia has turned into a corpse of 30 gay and lesbian policemembers who patrol Amsterdam streets encouraging same sex loving people to denounce aggressions. Though the report on the Eurogaypolice site points to Arab on Arab attacks, El Pais reports that the aggressor profile is more diffuse, noting that white supremacists may also be involved, while not exclusively attacking arab homosexuals.

At the same time, Manchester's police is looking for gay advisors to help them handle homophobia denounces, and in Spain, recent headilines about homophobia are not uncommon, with five attacks last month in Gandia, Valencia. Add all the cases in Eastern European countries, with violence in Moscow Pride and other ex Soviet republics now independent, the recent Gay Kiss issue in Italy, Poland's twins government, et al. No, this is no paradise for homosexuals, and homophobia can be awaiting behind any corner on any street, and that's why we must carry on the, let's say, normalization of homosexuality.

Friday, August 03, 2007

USA Refugees flee to Canada

Never let any news spoil a good headline, eh? Ok, I'm acting sensationalist this morning, blame it in not having my second coffee yet, and the border with Canada is not really flooded with millions of Americans. However, Erica Alini writes in FP Passport that the number of Americans "emigrating to Canada has almost doubled since 2000" according to a report [PDF format] issued by the Association for Canadian Studies. Says Erica:

"Although the Canadian study does not provide statistics about the emigrants' motivations, anecdotal evidence suggests that post-9/11 U.S. policies are a major drive for the move. Other reasons may include Canada's generous healthcare system and Canada's tolerance for gay marriage, as American emigrate Tom Kertes tells ABCNews."

Healthcare system apart, policy motivations and tolerance for gay marriage could be considered major cause of asylum, maybe we could be talking for the first time about USA refugees? Wow! And if ever the more leftist liberals (hey, that's just wishful thinking, ladies and gentlemen) could enact laws and acts with complete freedom, where the ultra religious right would seek asylum, the Vatican?

Down Low, Closet, Whatever...

Continuiing for a while with the thread started by fellow Islander yesterday about guys on the Down Low, Downlow or DL, I've gathered some information for readers of this blog who are not much aware of such mostly US/Black terminology, while at the same time presenting some curious and interesting issues.

 Back in 2002, writer Benoit Denizet-Lewis wrote an article for the New York Times Sunday Magazine called Double Lives On The Down Low. (link to PDF version) JL King went further, writing a book, "In the Down Low" which became a big seller. The term, according to Wikipedia, is a common urban usage word in the United States, meaning "keeping in secret", much as the word closet gained its significance among homosexual people when and where there's the need to not disclose one's own sexual orientation. Wikipedia goes further to describe the sexual usage of the term:

One popular usage of the Down-low is to describe discreet sexual behaviour, particularly that of people in relationships that are involved with others outside that relationship without the consent of their partner.

In recent years, in the gay community the down-low often refers to married men, or men professing to be heterosexual having sex with other men, but who identify themselves as neither homosexual nor bisexual. Many homosexual men use the term down-low to refer to their choice not to broadcast their sexual preference.

Among some sectors of male sub-culture (called "men on the DL" or "down-low"), same-sex sexual behavior is sometimes viewed as solely for physical pleasure. Men on the "down-low" may engage in regular, secret sex acts with other men while continuing sexual and romantic relationships with women. Some have argued that being openly gay may lead to considerable stigma in communities where traditional family behaviour is greatly valued, thus leading men to engage in male-to-male sex in secret while publicly maintaining heterosexual relationships.

 Serve all the above to clarify the term, which usage corresponds mostly but not also to the "closet" more usual word, for most european readers  but let's go further into the exploration of the Down Low world by pointing you to an article published last year in Slate by Denizet-Lewis himself, about the next generation of Down Low people, or how the white culture appropriates the Black (at least in the USA): Get Out of My Closet.

But there are diverse voices, of course. Keith Boykin argued against the relation of Down Low to Black men.

From my own point of view, being on the Down Low doesn't difer much from what our friend Gamal is living right now, or what some of us had to live when being in the closet, nor from some of the lives that arab men live in their countries. As long as you're perceived  masculine, you're relatively safe. Advice: don't believe you're safe, be actively safe.

Technorati tags: , , , ,

Comment on Post "A Story in First Person: Gamal Speaks from Egypt"

Hello 'Gamal'.

Abit about me : Gay Arab 22y born and living in an Arab Country (and yes with parents and no they dont entirely know about me).

Before I start I would like to thank you for having the courage to write about this. But what I am going to write to you might be harsh. But do not take it the wrong way, I am here to help.

Yes, when the time you first get the feeling of getting attracted toward another man, you just feel that you are the only person on earth having this strange feelings. And it is true that it is not in our hands to be which sexuality. It is not a choice; it just comes in birth 'bulit in' (genetics that I believe in).

You will hear so many people say, a person is gay, because he was raped or abused by a man especially when young, or because father is a bad guy just hitting him, or even that because you have gay friends, etc etc.. And it is all bull, none is true. If you were abused or raped in chilhood, that will actually make you hate men not sexually arouse you. But for some it is like a trigger that hey i like it with a man, like the trigger for some might be looking at their male teachers, drivers, friends, each person's trigger is different.

Now talking about your parents, it is so typical for arab families to threaten; because we are week towards them. But i tell you what, you are not obliged to accept what they say, your only duty is give them respect but NOT respecting their wishes or fullfilling their needs, wants and wishes.

Ya Gamal, those who love you will try to understand you, they dont need to accept it, but they can understand. Parents, family members, friends, who threaten you for money, for house, for friendship for what so ever, do not really love you. You need to start depending on your self and make them feel that you can live without their help. Do not make yourself helpless in front of them, even toward your relative that you adore more, if he damn loved you one bit, he/she would never react that way.

Say to yourself and to others, that you are not going to torture yourself in going into this money making therapies and degrading immoral inhuman therapies. Yes I know life can be tough in Egypt, but dude you are a graduate and you need to try harder to depend on yourself.

Now about listening to your parents needs and wishes. I simply call it just blackmails of parenting. Mothers will start saying I wanna see you married before I die, and once you are married her story flips into I want to see my grand children before I die. This is so typical manipulation. And please do not get offended, I am not trying to disrespect your parents, I am just telling you the plain truth. Even if you were Straight, it is your choice who and when to marry, and it is your choice to get and when to get kids or not.

Now if you stick upon your parents wishes, here is a glimpse of what and how you will like like:

1. You will get married to a women you do not love.
2. You will not be able to make love correctly with her because your emotions and thoughts are somewhere else, thus not being fair to her too.
3. Your mind will be imagining guys that you like while she is next to you.
4. You even might have problems getting it up while in bed with her, and you might start using tools to please you to get it up and of course your thoughts are on the guys.
5. You will be frustrated and will start cheating your wife to go out with guys, which causes more lies more deceits etc etc.
6. If you do get a child or children, you want be able to give full concentration to them. And what if your child would be gay, how would you deal it with your wife.
7. Depression for not having what you want.
8. Two lifes one for public, and one for yourself.
9. Regreting the things you have done.
.... And the list goes on ...

So habibi, you got to choose what you want, nobody else. Dramas, manipulations, threatnings, if you let those things control you, you will suffer.

Lastly, you are not a shame for anybody. Its just a shame that parents do not converse with their kids but rather threaten them. Again, you do not need to be ashamed of yourself for anything. Plus, keep God close to you, and doesn't matter what people think. And I hope somebody sometime stop those cruel so called doctors from what they are doing.

Thanks and please take nothing personally. I am not attacking or trying to hurt anyone.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Straight Commentary on the "Down Low" lifestyle

Hi Juan, thanks for the invitation to post. I have a small contribution i think your readers may find interesting.

I received an interesting youtube video in my email recently. It was a short documentary/discussion by straight black Americans about DL/Gay/Lesbian Americans. In it they talk about what they like or don't like about the choices made by the DL community, and how they should be treated. While i may not agree fully with the content of the discussion i see the fact that the discussion is occurring and questions are being asked as a vital first step. For this reason, i encourage everyone to share this video, consider its content and spread the discussion.

Link to youtube video: Downlow Real talk

Nigerian Gay Activist's family attacked.

Via the Gay Religion blog and Gay/Lesbian News we come across an attack on a Nigerian activist family.

Gun men invaded the family house of Davis Mac-Iyalla, Director of Changing Attitude, Nigeria, in Nigeria and started shooting. They killed 20 people. The family was gathered for the swearing in ceremony for one of his brothers. He had just been appointed as Commissioner by the Rivers State Governor. His mother was shot in the leg and is still in the local hospital. His cousin Opali was killed. Davis' brother, who was the main target, managed to escape. Davis currently lives in exile after receiving repeated death threats following his vocal opposition to Anglican Archbishop Peter Akinola's anti-gay statements.

Though Davis Mac-Iyalla was not the target since he's in exile, and there could be political reasons other than homophobia for such attack, be it killing a Commissioner or killing the brother of a gay activist, we regret such acts of terror.

BBC World: Coming out in Jamaica

BBC world news wired the first part of a documentary about homophobia worldwide. This first part, aired on July 23rd, deals with Jamaica:

"There have been calls for a gay eradication day, mob violence towards homosexual people is tolerated by the police, and there is a lot of ignorance and fear.

Gay rights are not on the agenda and are unlikely to be in the future. As a result, many homosexuals stay firmly in the closet.

But what happens when people choose to come out under such hostile social circumstances?"

Allegedly the program can only be listened to by UK residents, however I've been able to download the mp3 file. The link to the program on the BBC site is this, but if it's not working, just send me a message and I'll manage to send the file to you, it's about 10 Mb.