Saturday, November 17, 2007

Are you God Almighty?

Many a time you have thought of yourself as Divine, but are you really? Answer this test and find out!!!

1.- You know that some evil king named Herod is going to murder every child in his country aged below 2. You...
a) Denounce the situation to all the country's citizens so they can take measures.
b) Only warn your neighbors.
c) Escape to Egypt not giving notice to anybody.

2.- You're in need to send a message to humankind. You...
a) Being God Almighty, you appear before the whole humankind simultaneously.
b) Being God Almighty, you jam TV signals on prime time.
c) Being God Almighty, you appear before some obscure humble shepherds that nobody will believe.

3,- When thinking about having a baby...
a) You are going to have it with your wife/partner.
b) You think of adopting one.
c) You send a dove in charge of fertilizing some woman.

4.- You send some guy to the task of rescuing your chosen people from captivity in Egypt via a 40-years trip through the desert. When arriving to the promised land...
a) You give that guy an extra payment for the task.
b) You cheer that guy for doing his task well.
c) You tell that guy that you've decided him to die never setting foot on the promised land.

5.- You've got a son, the epitome of absolute goodness and justice, you send him to earth, and it seems that everybody there cheers and welcomes  him as leader of a just, equalitarian society...
a) You have him running for president of the Republic.
b) You name him King.
c) You leave him to be crucified.

6.- Your followers have founded a religion. What's your opinion about all the other beliefs?
a) I don't see myself as a religious person.
b) I do respect all other beliefs.
c) I think all people not believing in my followers' religion should be killed in a jihad or crusade, and this message I do make known by my followers on earth.

7.- When confronted to social injustice, you...
a) Being God Almighty, I do correct inequalities.
b) I give realms to the poor.
c) I leave things as is.

8.- Let's suppose you're the one and only God in creation. Would you allow other religions to exist?
a) I am atheist/agnostic.
b) Yes, but I'll make clear they'll go to hell.
c) Yes, but I'll make my representatives on earth to invade infidels' countries to rape and murder them on a jihad or crusade. After that, I'd send the infidels to hell.

9,- Do you believe in women's rights?
a) Yes.
b) No, but I admit the possibility that women have souls, and even that women could be qualified as human beings.
c) No. Women are inferior beings and that's made clear in my doctrine.

10.- Besides gold, what would you ask the Three Wise Men for?
a) A house and a good job.
b) A Wii and an iPhone.
c) Incense and myrrh.


Majority of A - No, you're not really God Almighty.
Majority of B - You've got manners. You've got some qualities to become god of some monotheist religion, but you lack toughness.
Majority of C - Indeed, you're God Almighty.

(Badly translated from Spanish, via Halón Disparado).

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